Three Little Jewells

Archive for the category “Christianity”

28 Nov 2011

Romans 5:3-4

Two Good Bits That I have Been Marinating On

Romans 5:3-4  we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance, character; and character, hope.

I’ve been thinking about this verse lately as it relates to parenting children, especially the difficult ones.    So often I am frustrated by this child’s behavior & attitude when really, I should so grateful!    Grateful that this sin isn’t hidden away where it is difficult to see and thus to root out.   Grateful that we are able to work on these issues together- because this tribulation will result in perseverance & hope for BOTH of us!  Isn’t that a wonderful thing?!?!

 

Psalm 123:3 Have mercy on us, O Lord, have mercy on us!  for we are exceedingly filled with contempt.  

When we discern that other people are not growing spiritually and allow that discernment to turn to criticism, we block our fellowship with God.   God never gives us discernment so that we may criticize, but that we may intercede.  -OC

 

I have been on the receiving end of such criticism, and oh, how it hurts.  I pray that God will show me how and when to intercede and will not allow a spirit of condemnation, superiority and critical thinking to grow in my heart towards others.

Posted in Christianity, Family, Parenting | Leave a Comment
20 Feb 2011

I read this amazing post today- this is exactly what we are trying to avoid with our children.     If you are a Christian parent, trying to raise Christian children, then this is a must read.

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From this blog:   Letter From a Christian College Student

I recieved this letter from a young lady last week—a Bible college student who grew up in a Christian home and Christian school. I believe it’s the saddest letter I’ve ever read and right on the mark for so detailing the experiences of so many young Christians. I asked her permission to post it. Please read. Her words will greatly challenge you as a parent or pastor:

Dear Pastor Schmidt,

A few years ago, I read your books Hook, Line, and Sinker, Discover Your Destiny, and Life Quest. I found them to be extremely encouraging and instructive. These books showed me that not only do you have a real heart for young people, but you also understand us well. I am writing to ask you to consider writing a book to our parents and youth workers. Let me explain.

I am a junior at a well-known Christian college. I grew up in highly respected “fundamental independent Baptist” churches, and went to excellent Christian schools. My father has been a Christian worker since before I was born. One would think that my testimony would go something like this:

“I was saved when I was about 5 and I had dedicated my life to God and I have been growing a lot and serving Him and now I’m studying to serve Him full time.” But that isn’t my story. Actually, though I did make a profession of faith when I was very young, I didn’t get saved until I was 17. Since I was 12 and now on into college I have struggled with “serious” issues. And I found out when I went to college that I am not the only “good kid” who is or has struggled with or is still struggling with serious stuff. We struggle with issues like eating disorders, depression and suicide, cutting, pornography, gender identity, homosexuality, drugs, drinking, immorality, and the list could go on. We listen to “wild” music, we idolize pop culture’s heroes, we watch dirty sitcoms. We have no discrimination in our entertainment, dress, or any aspect of our lifestyle. Obviously, I’m generalizing our problems—you would not find that every Christian young person from a conservative background struggles with all of these issues, and praise God, some of us do not struggle with any of these issues.

My point is that the problems that are supposed to be bad kid’s problems belong to us too. Unfortunately, our parents and youth workers don’t know that we struggle with these things and they don’t know what to do with us when they find out. Quite frankly, I believe that if you grabbed the average Christian school teacher or youth worker and asked them, “What would you do if you found out that one of the kids you work with was a homosexual?” they wouldn’t know what to say.

My point is not simply that they don’t know what we struggle with or how to deal with it. I think there is a pretty simple reason why “good” kids struggle with such serious stuff. And that there is a solution. At the risk of being blunt, I’m going to be blunt.

Our parents did not spend time teaching us to love God. Our parents put us in Sunday Schools since K4. Our parents took us to church every time the doors opened, and sent us to every youth activity. They made sure we went to good Christian colleges. They had us sing in the choir, help in the nursery, be ushers, go soulwinning. We did teen devotionals, and prayed over every meal. We did everything right. And they made sure that we did.

But they forgot about our hearts. They forgot that the Bible never commanded the church to teach children about God and His ways. That responsibility was laid at the feet of our fathers. Unfortunately, our fathers don’t have time for us. They put us where we are surrounded by the Bible. But they didn’t take time to show us that God was important enough to them to tell us personally about Him. So to us, Christianity has become a religion of externals. Do all the right stuff, and you’re a good Christian. So, some of us walk away from church. Some of us stay in church and fill a pew. Many of us struggle with stuff that our parents have no idea about because they hardly know us.

I think these problems stem from first, our detachment from our parents, and second from our misunderstandings about the essence of Christianity—a relationship, not a list of rules. I worry that many young people like me are not even saved because of their misunderstandings about Christianity.

I know that this has not been a well articulated treatise, but it comes from my heart. If you are able to help us and our families, we would be so grateful. I realize that probably, there is no way to fix the fact that kids my age are detached from our parents or to straighten out the crazy stuff that we struggle with. The alienation is fixed, the scars are permanent. I know our situation is not hopeless. God is at work in my life and my generation, among those of us who have struggled and are struggling. But maybe our younger siblings can have some help that we never had. Maybe you can write a book for our parents that will grab their attention and help them see that this is serious—that their kids need them, desperately.

I guess I’ve run out of things to say. I must say I’m a little hesitant to share my name with you because that attaches me with my parents, who are, by the way, good people. Thanks for everything you have already done to help Christian teens and their families. I’m eager to see what else God will do through you.

Sincerely,

(Name Removed to Protect Anonymity)

All I could say when I read this letter was, “WOW! She nailed it!” This is the battle I’ve been fighting for twenty one years. I’m planning to write a couple of follow up articles to this letter, but for now, let this insightful young lady’s words sink in, and let God help you evaluate your own parenting and influence.

Are we teaching kids to simply appear and act right? Or are we teaching them to LOVE God and KNOW Him personally?

What are your thoughts?

Posted in Christianity, Interesting Stuff, Parenting | Leave a Comment
07 Jan 2011

Taking Every Thought Captive

Some notes on taking every thought captive from Kay on the RGT message board:

Taking Every Thought Captive

I have had some issues with obsessive thinking about issues I needed to leave in Gods hands too. Things that have helped me….

***Replace the *lie* with Gods truth, literal tangible in my hands truth. Like writing out *counter scriptures* on flash cards and carrying them around in my pocket or taping them to my wall. Do word and topical searches on the truth you need to be thinking on. For instance, if the thought is *I cant deal with my sons absence, I love him too much* write out *I can do ALL things through Christ which strengthens me* on a flash card and every time that carnal thought starts to come recite the truth. Declare it with conviction.

***Give yourself grace to fail, this is your son, you will have good victorious days where peace reigns and then days where you flop. On the days you flop don’t despair. A righteous man falls seven times and gets back up…

***Repent when you obsess and ask God for Joy. Let the joy of the Lord be your strength.

***Cultivate gratitude and fight bitterness like crazy. If resentment has set in, repent and work diligently to weed it out.

***Dont settle for anything less than victory. Dont let this steal your soul. Victory is your only option and Christ is your only resource for victory. Fight, work, seek, yield, repent, surrender, do whatever it takes to maintain a right spirit that glorifies God.

***Remember Christ has ordered this for your life that He might receive glory, count it all joy. Keep asking Him what the lessons are so you dont have to retake the test. smile

***This may be the most important yet simple tip…smile smile. Smile regardless how you feel. Fake it. Smile for your little ones, yourself, your husband and to glorify God. Make yourself act cheerful for the sake of your family. Perhaps God WILL reward this effort of selflessness and give you real smiles.

***The Word makes it clear that we are to diligently seek wisdom….Proverbs 2 tells us to do these thing in order to obtain wisdom……
•accept
•store up
•turn your ear
•apply your heart
•call out
•cry aloud
•search for it as silver

***Refuse to passively sit back and hope it all pans out, it wont. This is going to take some work. I dont mean working at relationship with your son, I mean work to make sure your reactions glorify God. Work to let go of everything except Christs will.

Posted in Christianity | Leave a Comment
19 Nov 2010

Operation Christmas Child Shoeboxes

I’ve wanted to participate with this charity for years but always lacked either the funds or the time to do so.  Finally, this year we were able to do it.  The kids are getting old enough to participate which, of course, made it more fun.  We spent several weeks talking a bit here & there about children who might not ever receive a Christmas gift and how this was one way to show them the love of Christ through our actions.   We watched several of the Operation Christmas Child videos posted online.  The kids used their allowance money to go shopping at Dollar General- we picked out toys, books, crayons and notepads, combs, toothbrushes & toothpaste.  Playing cards.  Hairbobs, baby dolls & mini tea sets for the girls.  Robots, cars, action figures, magnifying glasses for the boy box.  Candy for all.  The boxes were packed so full we could barely close them.   We enclosed pictures of our family, drawings from Mary & prayed over the boxes.   Then we took them to the local Church to deliver them.     We had great fun doing this project & I can’t wait to do it again next year!

11/16/10- Boxes all packed & ready to deliver! I wish I’d thought to take a picture of packing the boxes.  Also, we paid for the shipping so that we could track the boxes and find out what country they go to.    When we find out where they went, I’m going to look up a video on youtube of kids opening their Christmas boxes from that country for my kids to see.

DELIVERED!!!

Posted in Christianity, Christmas | Leave a Comment
09 Jan 2010

Devotions

Family Devotions

A friend recently asked me about what we are using for family devotions in the evenings.  Here is the email I sent her.

The book is “Leading  Little Ones to God” by Marian Schoolland.  Here is the opening to the book, which I like…

“This book is intended to be a guide to parents who desire to teach their little ones about God.  Parents are the child’s best teachers, and perhaps there is nothing more important in his or her spiritual development than quiet talks with Mother or Father about the great God who made us and loves us.”

The book is divided into 14 parts with each part having 4-8 devotions.

1. Looking for God
2. God is Very Great
3. All that God Does is Good
4. Sin Spoiled the World
5. God’s Law
6. God Loves Us
7. What Jesus Did
8. About the Holy Spirit
9. How We Become Children of God
10. How God’s Children Live and Grow
11. God Helps His Children Live for Him
12. When We Pray to God
13. About God’s Church
14. Things That are To Happen

For example, Part 12. “When We Pray To God” contains these devotions:  What it means to Pray, Praying in Jesus’ Name, Where we should pray, How we should pray, What we may ask for in prayer, How God answers our prayers, The most important prayer.

****Something else we do, that I forgot to mention on the phone last night, is memorize scripture & prayers. We used this idea for our scripture memory system and it is working beautifully.   http://simplycharlottemason.com/timesavers/memorysys/

Love that it uses things you already have or can find at Wal-Mart.

We started memorizing last spring when Nathan was a young 4 and he has picked up quickly.  I would bet that your son could memorize some of the shorter verses pretty easily.

Some that we have memorized are Prov. 28:13, Phil. 4:13, Luke 1:37, John 14:6, Genesis 1:1, Ephesians 6:1, Psalm 119:11.

They are currently working on memorizing this prayer:  (Mary has it down pretty good, Nathan is almost there)

A Child’s Prayer

Lord, teach a little child to pray,

And then accept my prayers,

For thou can hear the words I say,

For thou are everywhere.

A little sparrow cannot fall

Unnoticed, Lord, by thee;

And though I am so young and small,

Thou does take care of me.

Teach me to do the thing that is right,

And when I sin, forgive;

And make it still my chief delight

To serve You while I live.

To help them memorize: I simply say a portion out loud, have them repeat it, I say the next part, they repeat it.   We do it once or twice a day until they have the whole passage memorized.  It takes almost no time.   For example:

Ephesisans 6:1  Children, obey your parents in the Lord for this is right.
Me: Ephesians 6:1
Mary: repeats above.
Me: Children, obey your parents
Mary: repeats
Me: in the Lord
Mary: repeats
Me: for this is right.
Mary: repeats.
We might do this twice in the evening.

******In addition to LLOTG, scripture & prayer memorization, the children are also memorizing the Catechism for Young Children.
http://www.reformed.org/documents/index.html?mainframe=http://www.reformed.org/documents/cat_for_young_children.html

I initially printed out the entire document above but that was a little bulky for daily use so last year I bought it in booklet form- these are 2 small booklets and I keep them with the above memory system.  There are 2 booklets and they are $2.75 each- pretty cheap.
http://www.doorposts.com/details.aspx?id=8

So far they have memorized questions 1-20- SUCH a good foundation for basic knowledge of the Christian faith.   As we work through the catechism, if there is a question/answer we disagree with theologically I will either skip it or design my own “answer” for them to memorize.  So far it hasn’t been a problem.

*****I’m sure you have a good Children’s Bible but I thought I’d mention this one just in case.   After hearing several recommendations for Egermeier’s Bible Story Book we bought one and are very pleased with it.  Nice illustrations.  Short stories that are readable in 5 minutes or less.  BUT- best of all- so many Bible Story Books only contain the main Bible Stories- what I like about Egermeier’s is that it starts at the beginning, works through the entire Bible- it is VERY comprehensive.

***MUSIC- We use Wee Sing Bible Songs- I pick one song and we learn a stanza at a time in the evenings.  We sing through it once or twice at the end of devotions until we have it memorized. Pretty simple.
http://www.amazon.com/Wee-Sing-Bible-Songs-Book/dp/B002V1GZAU/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1262992914&sr=1-1

*So, we do a little of all of the above.  We try to work through LLOTG once a year and the rest of the year we read through Egermeier’s.  It only takes 15 minutes or so to do the reading, practice the current memory verse & review an older one, go through the Catechism questions and work on our Bible Song.   We don’t do it EVERY single night- we strive for 5 nights a week but it is often closer to 3 or 4 nights.

Posted in Christianity, Homeschooling | Leave a Comment
10 Jun 2009

Random Bits- Beach, Birthday…

Savannah Marie, 22 months old.   6/5/2009- We bought this antique school desk for $20 last winter.   It’s in the study, fully stocked with paper, crayons, markers and the like.  Savannah LOVES to copy her big sister and sit in this desk and color.  Look at her little crossed feet and her tiny toes- I know I say it all the time but oh, my- she is so stinkin’ cute!

On My Mind Lately…

1. I am *SO* excited about this summer!  The last couple of years we haven’t had much fun.

Summer of 2006- we were selling a house, buying a house, doing major renovations on the new house and, the most devastating thing, we had a miscarriage.

Summer of 2007- Kip’s Mom was dying.   She was in the hospital and then hospice from June until she passed away on August 1.  I was 7,8,9 months pregnant and home alone 18 hours a day, 7 days a week with a 2 1/2 year old and a 3 1/2 year old.    It was pretty terrible.  Sweet Savvy was born on 8/13- just 13 days after Kip lost his Mom.

Summer of 2008 was a little better- we didn’t have any tragedies but we just didn’t do much at all.   Which was fine- but I’m looking forward to doing more fun things this summer.

This summer we are:

1. Renting a “mountain villa” at Bear Den Campground. I am loving the playgrounds, lake and sandy beach, waterfalls.  It looks so fun.  One of our vacation days will be spent at Tweetsie Railroad- I’ve never been but Kip says the kids will love the train ride, etc.   The rest of the time we are going to putter around the campground and relax.

2. The kids are taking swim lessons at the pool in our town every other week, all summer long.   We don’t have a pool and last summer I felt so bad- our kids got to go swimming ONCE between June and August.

3.  I think we are going to go to Raccoon Holler for the 4th of July.   We had so much fun last year!   This year I’m going to enter Nathan in the Watermelon eating contest because that boy loves some watermelon- he ate 10 pieces at lunch on Friday!   They also have a dog costume contest, a golf cart parade complete with throwing candy and Santa,  a live Bluegrass Concert down by the lake and really good fireworks.

4. We’re renting THIS HOUSE for a week at the beach- this will be our 3rd time there.   We’re going to go to Shackelford Shores again this year and Kip wants to go the Maritime Museum in Beaufort.    I can’t wait- this was one of our favorite vacations ever.

5. Kip is putting in a fire pit in our backyard so that we can start having campfires and roasting marshmallows at home.

6.  There is an ice cream store that just opened up a few minutes from our house- we’ll definitely be doing more “ice cream runs”.  (I was going to post the link to this but now I can’t find it.  Anyway- what we do is, like any regular night put the kids in their pajamas, brush their teeth, put them to bed.   Then we wait 5 or 10 minutes and Kip and I go running up the stairs shouting “HEY!  WHO WANTS TO GO GET ICECREAM???”   Of course, the kids come tumbling and running out of their beds and off we go.   THIS is the kind of thing that they remember as adults and look back on.   So.MUCH.FUN.

2. Savannah’s birthday- she’ll be 2 years old!!!- is coming up in August and I haven’t got one clue in the world what to get her.    If you’ve got an idea, email me or leave me a note in the comments.

3. I’ve been reading The Sane Woman’s Guide to Raising a Large Family and gleaning quite a few good ideas.    (Not that I have a large family- I’ve been reading her blog off and on for several years so decided to get the book)

My favorite idea for a family tradition is to celebrate “half birthdays”. Each kid, on their half birthday (the day 6 months between their last birthday and the next birthday) gets to go out for a special evening with their opposite-sex parent.   So,  on 7/3 just Nathan and I would go out to dinner and then maybe get ice cream or visit the used book store or the toy store.    Kip will take Mary on 8/3 and Savvy on 2/13.  We both love this idea and I’ve marked the calender to do this.

4.  I just finished “Stepping Heavenward” by Elizabeth Prentiss and loved it. I can’t believe I haven’t read this before.  This is definitely a book for underlining and re-reading.

I plan to go back over it with a red pen, maybe this weekend.  One thing she suggested was to focus on reading deeply as opposed to widely.    To really read and re-read something until the ideas in the book are a part of you.   I applied that idea to this sermon (more on that in a minute) and have listened to it three times in the last two days and will probably listen to it a few more times over the coming weekend.

5. Speaking of sermons, I just listened to  THIS SERMON (scroll down and choose “March Voddie Baucham”) and like Amy said, “I can’t believe he got away with it!”

(hat tip to Generation Cedar)

“We despise children in the Southern Baptist Convention.”

-Voddie Baucham

Can I say, “AMEN!” to this?!!!    In my opinion, EVERY WORD of what he said is TRUE and I admire his courage to say so.

6.  This GORGEOUS Red Tailed Hawk and his mate have a nest in our neighbors tree. (picture from Google Images)  We see him several times a week.  I see at least one of them almost every morning that I go out for a walk.   This morning he was in the middle of the road, just sitting there, as I came back up our street.   He flew up to a low-hanging branch when he saw me coming.  I walked up and stood right under him- we just stared at each other for a minute or two before he flew away.   It was neat to get such a good look at him.  I *wish* I could see in their nest.  I keep meaning to take my binoculars and try to see them some afternoon during naptime.

7.  As I was driving into town yesterday, I drove past a small lake and this Great White Egret flew RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY CAR. It was so, so cool.  He was just beautiful.  (picture from Google Images)

gg

Posted in Christianity, Daily Life, Interesting Stuff, Opinions, Savannah | Leave a Comment
15 Oct 2008

Getting Ready for the Holidays, vol.1 – Planning Activities

Do the holidays just exhaust anyone like they do me?

I know I spent several years feeling overwhelmed, harrassed and worn out by the holidays.   I spent all my time running all over the place and almost no time doing the fun stuff- crafts, baking, visiting.

I’m going to do several posts on how I’ve turned the holidays from a time of stress and aggravation into something fun and relaxing.

Planning the FUN stuff- If I don’t make an effort to plan for us to do fun things they just don’t happen.  Days slide by and before I know it Christmas is here and we never did any fun Halloween or Thanksgiving stuff.

First, I visit Family Fun Holiday Recipes and  Family Fun Holiday Crafts. I choose several fun recipes and crafts to try out for the Autumn/Halloween/Thanksgiving season and printed them out.

Then I use a scrap piece of paper and brainstorm everything else I’d like to do.   Like visit J. Razz & Tazz Farm,  make apple pie and apple crisp, the Thanksgiving/Autumn/Halloween crafts, do leaf rubbings with the kids, etc.   Here’s my scratch paper with stuff written down.

Next I check my calender to see what else is on the agenda.   We have our neighborhood Fall Picnic on Saturday 10/25 and some relatives coming on Sunday 10/12.


Then I print out these sheets.   Each box represents one week.  I dislike writing on the calender for this because it takes up to much room and then I feel obligated to get things done on whatever day it’s written on or I feel behind which is annoying.  (runon sentence???)

There are four of these pages- each with three weeks (boxes) on them.  This covers the twelve weeks from the beginning of October through Christmas.

Within each week I write down the MUSTS first- visiting relatives, etc. that are already marked on the calender.  Then I try to add in 2-3 activities each week- outings, recipes, crafts, etc.    On the first week one of my scheduled things to do is to look ahead at what items I will need to complete any activities for the following several weeks and purchase them.  I do NOT want to be running out to the AC Moore or not doing an activity because we don’t have what we need.

Pictures of the finished schedule:

Posted in Christianity | Leave a Comment
19 Sep 2008
2 Comments

We Are Called…

This was posted on a message board that I go to by mamalama.   Loved it so thought I would share it here.

We Are Called… to bless our husbands, not to bless our sober husbands.

We Are Called… to honor our husbands, not to honor our wise husbands.

We Are Called… to submit to our husbands, not to submit to our tender husbands.

We Are Called… to respect our husbands, not to respect our selfless husbands.

We Are Called… to serve our husbands, not to serve our faithful husbands.

We Are Called… to praise our husbands, not to praise our industrious husbands.

We Are Called… to fellowship with our husbands, not to fellowship with our thoughtful husbands.

We Are Called… to be kind to our husbands, not to be kind to our appreciative husbands.

We Are Called… to love and adore these men that God has united us with, for better or for worse. Our assignment doesn’t change with our husband’s moods or behavior.

Posted in Christianity, Interesting Stuff, Marriage/Submission, Opinions
21 Aug 2008

Who “wears the pants” in your family?

Jess at Making Home has written a fabulous post entitled

“When the person that “wears the pants” in the family is a size 2T”.

Here’s a few excerpts to encourage you to head over to her blog and read what she has to say:

What concerns me is that I see too many children raised in Christian families who are not taught and expected to obey. They are allowed to dishonor their parents with their yelling, tantrums, and emotional displays. They are allowed to intentionally and brazenly disobey their parents, without repercussions of any kind. They are encouraged in selfishness and materialism by parents who don’t set limits and stand by them. They are outright rude to siblings, guests and adults, and it goes uncorrected.

We have less children than any generation before us, and more parenting advice at our fingertips, and yet we parent them worse.


What does matter, biblically speaking, is that you train your child in the way he should go. What does matter, biblically speaking, is that you teach your child to obey you (his/her parents) in everything. What does matter, biblically speaking, is that foolishness is driven out from your child’s heart and is replaced with a fear of God and an understanding of what the Lord has done for us, and for this world.

Posted in Christianity, Daily Life, Interesting Stuff, Links, Opinions, Parenting | Leave a Comment
11 Aug 2008

Are We Pro-Children???

I recently came across this amazing article.   It’s written by a Catholic for a Catholic audience.   Every time she mentions “Catholic”, in  your mind subsitute “Christian”.   It’s just as true for Protestant Christians as it is for Catholics.   Enjoy.

Are We a Pro-Life People?

By Danielle Bean

Last week, Simcha Fisher invited us to talk about natural family planning, and boy did we comply. More than 90 comments later, one thing is clear — this is a topic we like to debate.

I’ve read many different discussions about NFP where Catholics will debate its use and its abuse, its effectiveness and its complications, its rewards and its challenges. There is a time, however, when all the debates and discussions must fall silent.

When a battle-weary mother stands alone in her bathroom looking with disbelief at two tiny pink lines on a pregnancy test, it’s too late for family-planning discussions of clinical effectiveness. We’ve got a baby to take care of. And his mother.

This is where all our pro-life and pro-family talk needs to be put into action. This is where we need to rush to the aid and support of a family in need. Are we a pro-life Church? This is where we will find out.

“I just found out that I am pregnant with my third baby in three years,” one frazzled young mother wrote to me recently, “and I dread the way my friends, my family, and even the people at my parish will respond.”

Shame on us.

“I am pregnant again and I really am excited,” another mother wrote to me, “I want this baby, but I am not sure I want to tell people because it seems like so many people, even faithful Catholics, just don’t get why you would be excited to have your fourth baby in five years.”

Shame on us.

“Soon after I announced that we were (unexpectedly) pregnant with our eighth child,” an older mom once wrote me, “I came out of Mass one day and found an NFP flyer tucked under the windshield wiper of my van. I even wondered if it was our pastor who put it there.”

Shame on us.

Whether we love NFP or hate it, whether we choose to use it in our marriages or not, whether we have one child or 16 children, we Catholics have no business receiving new life with anything but charity and joy. We have no business labeling our fellow Catholics, in their time of need and vulnerability, as crazy or irresponsible.

It takes courage for many Catholic couples to continue to refuse contraception, to remain open to life in their marriages, even when their circumstances are already difficult and they are hoping to avoid another pregnancy. The “99 percent effective” number people like to throw around about NFP becomes a much smaller one when translated into “user effectiveness.”

The fact is, sometimes even faithful Catholics who are doing their very best to avoid pregnancy while remaining faithful to Church teaching on openness to life will find themselves pregnant.

The jokes, the judgment, and the whispered conversations about “craziness” and “irresponsibility” have no place in our parishes and in our Catholic communities.

Over the years, I’ve done my fair share of staring in disbelief at tiny pink lines in the bathroom. Once, a few years ago, when I told a friend of a new and unplanned pregnancy and expressed to her my ambivalent feelings, her response to me was a simple, joyful exclamation:

“God must love you so much!”

Her words startled me. Not only because most people’s reactions to my latest news had been somewhat less than joyful, but also because of how true I knew those words were, deep down inside, in spite of my doubts and fears.

When God gives us babies, planned or unplanned, He gives us innumerable physical, emotional, and spiritual challenges. But He also gives us a glimpse of Himself. It’s God’s face we see in a helpless baby’s smile. It’s God’s voice we hear in their needy cries, and it’s God’s enormous love we feel wrapped around us when we nurture them within us, when we hold their infant bodies, when we accept them as He sends them, whether it was part of “our plan” or not.

Because she said “yes” to God, Mary once found herself poor, alone, misunderstood, and pregnant. But she wasn’t irresponsible — only faithful. Even though it was hard.

Will we abandon pregnant mothers in their time of need? Will we shame them, shun them, and laugh at them behind their backs?

Or will we remind them how much God loves them, remind ourselves of the abundant, undeserved blessings He has given every one of us, and simply be grateful?
Posted in Christianity, Interesting Stuff, Opinions, Parenting | Leave a Comment

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